Praise in The Darkest Days

I placed my strainer full of strawberries in the sink, lightly spraying them off with the cool water from the faucet. Maybe making jam will make me feel better. Plopping my cutting board on the counter, I took them–one by one–and sliced off the top, cutting them down the middle and tossed them into a bowl. Although my body may have been physically standing in my kitchen, my mind was anything but present.

Just weeks prior, I received earthshattering news that our precious little boy Reese had Leukemia. At that point, we still didn’t know what his fate would be. A rare genetic chromosome complicated his prognosis making his treatment even more aggressive. We were in survival mode and I was struggling to just get from one day to the next. 

It was in those weeks and months after his diagnosis where I found a life-line. One that got me through some of my most darkest days: Praise. Crying out to God lifted me from the pain of my circumstances to the supernatural comfort of His promises. Just as it did on that late afternoon in my kitchen. Lifting my hands toward the sky, I belted out the lyrics of, “Here again” by Elevation Worship, from the deepest part of my soul:

Can't go back to the beginning

Can't control what tomorrow will bring

But I know here in the middle

Is a place where You promise to be

With tears streaming down my face, I kept singing:

I'm not enough unless You come

Will You meet me here again?

'Cause all I want is all You are

Will You meet me here again?

It was praise that got me through this most painful season. And not just songs of praise. But anything I could do to draw near to God and pour what I had out at his feet. I had to completely surrender and seek Him in new ways. Praise helped me trust in this incredibly difficult season. God was still good. He was still on the throne.

I had literal stacks of journals and tabs of notes on my phone to capture all I was pouring out: My lament. My thanksgiving. My questions, oh so many questions. The countless stories of God’s people meeting our daily needs. The glimpses of beauty. My fears and worries. My deep, overflowing joy when the cancer was no longer found. 

And I can’t forget the hike up Mount Yona in Northeast Georgia with my brother and sister-in-law. With every turn and ascension, I was a step closer to the prize awaiting me: a view so spectacular, I had to sit down to fully soak in its beauty. Being outside made me feel closer to God. The vibrant colors, the tall mountain peeks, the vast wildlife. Drawing close to God in the setting of nature gave me incredibly peace. His presence was so real.

See, that’s what praise does–it sets our eyes on the One who is worthy of it. It lifts us from our circumstances. It draws us closer. We give Him our complete trust, and every fiber of our heart.

Praise is a beautiful thing, it will expand your view of God in the most exciting and unexpected ways. What once felt mundane and ordinary will feel exciting again, or perhaps exciting for the very first time. No matter your circumstance, take time to seek Him, to surrender, and to receive the joy that only comes with praise.